Five Surprising Things This Divorced Mom Learned After Becoming a Stepmom

      It really is a mindf**k. Okay, so after almost seven years of writing about divorced moms and stepmoms, I thought I understood how and why so many stepmoms were having such a hard time. The kids weren’t hers. The ex-wife didn’t want her around. Perhaps her partner was unwittingly just plugging her […]

Why Owning Your Own Crap Empowers You

Most of us are reluctant to turn the flashlight back on ourselves and look at the ways we might have screwed up. After all, who likes feeling like they’ve messed up? Like the balance of power has shifted in the story and all of a sudden, instead of the other person being so predictably wrong […]

The Family-Family Meeting Blow-up

For a while there, whenever our dual-family family was ironing out some major issues—like which kid was living where, and for how long—we’d have these really intense family meetings. We’d all sit around the kitchen table after dinner, or in the living room, half of us sprawled on the floor… and we’d talk. One of […]

Which boat are you in?

Many of you come to this site because you’re looking for information that might give you an advantage with your difficult mom/stepmom relationship. You want something extra to help you create a shift. Movement in the right direction. A breakthrough out of nowhere. You’re the only one who knows what it’s like in your particular […]

Success Story: Jesica and Mayra

What does it look like when the “bio-mom” and stepmom transform the ex-wife/stepmom relationship from hell? Here, we talk to two women who were formerly at war for years, but have suddenly made a breakthrough into a whole, new world of cooperation and promise. Mayra (the mom) and Jesica (the stepmom) from the D.C. area […]