Whew, worth the defacement risk!

We just got our first national review, and while it's a short one, and mixed in with a huge round-up of other books on step-parenting, it's a good one! None other than the esteemed Library Journal said, “Bitch is a worthy, energetic workbook…Chatty and funny, it provides useful ideas (e.g., make small offerings) and sound […]

Monday Maybe: Be stubborn about the truth!

(How did it go last week? Did you refrain from any unhelpful behavior, even once? Did you stop some of your negative thoughts mid-train? What did you discover?) Question for you, moving forward…. First, let's assume that you do indeed have some changes to make when it comes to creating a better relationship with the […]

The right names for the right meaning…

I just discovered the blog of a dear friend, Joel — one of my favorite people to climb with. I had no idea he was such a talented, closet scribbler! Here's a link to a thought-provoking post about how the names we have for each other in these newfangled family relationships don't really do justice […]

Book Review: Keeping Kids Out of the Middle

Imagine if children young and old could speak in keen, poignant words about how parental conflict affects them – in terms that adults would not only understand, but get their attention as well. Then imagine that those words have been channeled into a book by a child psychologist who’s surely put in his years consoling […]

Book review tomorrow: Keeping Kids Out of the Middle, by Benjamin Garber, PhD

Come back tomorrow, when we'll be reviewing "Keeping Kids Out of the Middle: Child-Centered Parenting in the Midst of Conflict, Separation and Divorce" by Benjamin Garber, PhD, sponsored by TLC Book Tours. Garber's got some great ideas for how parents can work together, during times when they'd be normally be pulling apart (and making the […]

Happy Holidays!

Some early Thanksgiving quotes for you, courtesy of Interlude Retreat's Thought of the Day archive, since we'll be out of town. May you feel blessed by abundance and realize all the many, many ways in which you are truly lucky! To have courage for whatever comes in life – everything lies in that. -Saint Teresa […]

Has our blog helped you?

We get the periodical request for private help by email, and upon rare occasions, a lively rant. But what we really love are comments! When a post generates lots of activity, it's great to see what everyone's thinking, what their own personal take is on an issue, even if folks disagree. Sometimes, especially when folks […]

QUIZ: Whose World Is This?

Sure, many mothers and stepmothers may not get along well, but they've got one very important thing in common. Neither one of them is ever going to be the "nuclear wife” in a family made up of Mom, Dad and the little ones. Perhaps an acknowledgment of the challenges and heartache associated with this fact […]

Some favorite quotes

New, long post coming tomorrow. For now, here are a few quotes I like: What is important is not what hurts and pleases, but to see what is true. And then that truth will operate, not you.-Krishnamurti He who fears he shall sufferalready suffers what he fears.-Montaigne It is not the perfect, but the imperfect […]

Blog round-up/shutdown

A weird thing happened on my way to a new post…. I thought I'd peruse a few blogs on our link list and see what folks have been up to so I could point readers in an interesting direction (kind of the lazy way to generate content, but sometimes, that's all you got). My first […]


Hi all! You'll be seeing and hearing a lot more from me, now that the first draft of the book is done! I inished Saturday, and am taking a few days off to get some distance before I jump back in for revisions. We had an amazing team of twenty-three reviewers helping us (friends, family, […]

How do you regroup?

Man…. Have you ever just gotten to a point with the mom or stepmom where you're about to tear your hair out? Or you feel like you're melting into a tiny, hopeless, muddy puddle? Or like you're going to catch the curtains on fire through the sheer power of your anger alone? The chapter we're […]

Painting in Germany

I know it's been incredibly quiet here. I've been working on the book and Carol (and the rest of the family too) just returned from Germany. Here's one of her daily paintings from her stay in Schluchsee, a picturesque little town in the Southwestern part of the country. You can read more about the creation […]

Who gets to define reality?

Where should we draw the line with our links? This is a question Carol and I found ourselves discussing in-depth the other day, after a recent event that I can’t discuss publicly. It certainly led to some tricky questions for us, without clear-cut answers. Such as… To what extent are we responsible for the content […]

The Fragile Bridge of Trust


When Indiana Jones threw sand out into the precipice, suddenly revealing an invisible bridge, he found the magical solution to quickly getting across, away from his enemies. But… he still had to actually cross the narrow bridge without falling off. Trust between you and the stepmom or mom is like that same skinny bridge made real […]

The Guilty Pleasure of Gossip


Gossip always comes back to bite you in the ass. And with stepmothers and ex-wives in particular, there seems to be plenty of it to go around. Think about it. The set-up is perfect. You’re probably privy to the odd personal detail about each other, and yet, if you’re like most women in this situation, […]