Thanksgiving Day Tango Tips, Part 1


Each day this week, I’m going to dole out a short tip on how to deal with Thanksgiving for dual-families (where you’re “stuck” with the stepfamily or the divorced family). So here’s the first one…. IT’S NOT ABOUT YOU. No, really. It isn’t. I know most things are, but this actually isn’t. If you’re having […]

Who’s in YOUR extended family?


Who’s in your extended family? How often do you see them? Who can you call when you’re in a pinch? Most families are spread far and wide these days, so when you need a parent, sibling, grandmother or grandfather to step in, you’re out of luck. But sometimes, the two linked households after a divorce […]

What's your word for 2010?


Every year, I choose a single word for the upcoming year for my resolution, instead of a list of to-do items. This seems to work a lot better than a bunch of “demands,” because that’s what most New Year’s resolutions eventually feel like! You can read more about previous words here…. My word for 2009 […]

What your stepchild’s mom wants you to know about her life


Mutual understanding is one of the most important ingredients in the ex-wife/wife coalition mix. This post is in response to a guest post from the stepmom’s perspective by author Wednesday Martin. Let the dialogue begin! It’s not easy to feel judged and misunderstood It’s not easy for me to be constantly seen at “the enemy” […]

Guest Post by Wednesday Martin: What your child's stepmother wants you to know about her life…


Please note: If you tried to leave a comment earlier and couldn’t, please try again, as comments should be working now. Host issues – we’re working on it…. Thanks! (Like it or not, the two women in your child’s or stepchild’s life are typically the hands-on parents. Gender roles die hard! With both sides vying […]

Sample Chapter

Tired of trying to figure out who’s at “fault” when it comes to the problems between you and the mom or stepmom? Here’s some food for thought! Chapter 6: Be Accountable (No One Else to Blame) From No One’s the Bitch (Globe Pequot Press), © Jennifer Newcomb Marine and Carol Marine, used by permission.

Raffle Prizes

We’re running a promotion from May 6- June 15! On May 6th, we’ll start collecting email addresses from everyone who signs up for our mailing list OR buys the book at our site and enter your name into a weekly raffle drawing (one drawing a week, for a total of four weeks) for the following […]

No One’s the Bitch: A Ten-Step Plan for Mothers and Stepmothers is a revolutionary, new approach to diffusing the traditional animosity between moms and stepmoms — and creating a brand, new version of an extended family that’s healthier and happier. If you’re ready to move forward and are curious about how to start resolving some […]

Monday Maybe: First, do no harm…

(Here’s a little experiment to try this week….) Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle. -Philo If you’re wanting to create a friendlier relationship with the mom or stepmom and aren’t sure where to start, first, consider doing something simple and stopping any subtly combative behavior. Is your voice tight when […]

Book summary

No One’s the Bitch: A Ten-Step Plan for Mothers and Stepmothers (Globe Pequot, 2009) will be out in stores in May. What it is: A humorous, yet helpful take on navigating the minefield that typically exists between moms and stepmoms. Why it’s relevant: Over a thousand new stepfamilies form every day! Imagine all those women […]

Introduction from our book

Download No One’s the Bitch_Introduction To read more about the book, click here!

Some favorite quotes

New, long post coming tomorrow. For now, here are a few quotes I like: What is important is not what hurts and pleases, but to see what is true. And then that truth will operate, not you.-Krishnamurti He who fears he shall sufferalready suffers what he fears.-Montaigne It is not the perfect, but the imperfect […]

A Tiny Bridgemaker – Part Two


I watched David and Carol go through the emotional rollercoaster of trying to adopt with one agency and my heart softened, even though I could tell the girls were nervous about the possibilities of such massive, looming change. I witnessed Carol and David’s intense heartbreak from afar when their efforts fell through; growing in sympathy, […]

A Tiny Bridgemaker – Part One


“All I know is, when we have a baby, I don’t want her to see it, hold it, or have anything to do with it. She just needs to stay away!” Those were the sentiments of Carol, my children’s stepmother. Luckily, I wasn’t around to hear this. Because “she” meant… “me.” But now, here I […]

Extended Families through a Teen's Eyes

Well, I thought I’d do a Vulcan mind-meld with my eldest daughter, S. to see if she had any staggering insights into life in an "extended family" and she basically looked at me as if I were wearing pants that reached all the way up to my tattered pocket protector.  (What’s wrong with pocket protectors?  […]