Your Mind is Effing You Over – Not Anyone Else

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Have you ever thought about how weird it is that so many people are divorced now?   I remember when my kids were in elementary school and I was still married, we were surrounded by other nuclear families during drop-offs and pick-ups and school events. In junior high, not so much. In high school, neither […]

Who gets more “emotional authority?”

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One day while talking on the phone, we realized: one reason these relationships between households can seem so impossible is because we have the two most important relationships of our lives competing against each other: parent and child vs. husband and wife. This creates a dynamic in relationships that we like to call “emotional authority.” […]

Weird: being wrong feels like being right!

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One subject that we talk a lot about here is how difficult it can be to see the other person’s perspective. And because you can’t see it, you end up digging in your heels in a difficult situation, attributing intentions to them that may be wildly off the mark and stoking your own emotional fires. […]

Never-before-seen Carol and Jen videos!

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These videos were filmed in Carol and David’s backyard, before the fire that burned their home to the ground, along with almost 1,700 homes and over 34,000 acres. Sadly, none of those trees are alive anymore… I’ve had these three videos of Carol (my kids’ stepmom and co-author of No One’s the Bitch) and I hanging […]

Guest Post: What Makes a Bitch?

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By Kat Kernohan It’s easy to dismiss a stepmom or divorced mom we are in conflict with as simply being a ‘bitch.’ In one simple word, we can shift all of the blame and responsibility for the conflict situation on to them – because they are the one at fault, they are the bitch. The […]